Motivate

During this semester, I also gained a great deal of knowledge and understanding about the notion of motivation as it pertains to the NEPEM model.

What is motivation? When the going gets difficult, motivation is what keeps you going. For a child who learns and thinks differently, motivation might be a challenge. However, there are ways you may support your child's motivation.

How can we empower our children to grow, make, and achieve their dreams? I'm going to go through a few ways we can help our kids get motivated, but bear in mind that not all motivational strategies are ideal.

Bribes

Bribes are a prime example of a motivational strategy that doesn't work. Bribery occurs when parents ask their children to do something in exchange for a reward. Bribes don't lead to long-term behavior changes; instead, they lead to short-term behavior changes in exchange for a prize typically unconnected to the task at hand, i.e., a reward that is not real. That means that this child, instead of learning and doing good things for the right reasons, is learning to do good things because they will receive a reward (maybe a treat?).

The effectiveness of bribes is only temporary, but many parents still employ them. Why is it so? The majority of parents want their children to always be happy. When their child cries or whines in any way, some parents rush to appease him or her, to halt the sobbing, whining, or other undesirable behavior. These parents wish for their children's happiness at all times. Bribery is an easy technique for parents to ensure that their children are content and compliant. Most of us have heard variations of the phrase, "If you do ____, you will get ____," either from our parents or others.

The true purpose of parenting is to help children mature and do good things of their own accord; bribes hinder this objective. If children must be bribed to do everything, are they genuinely developing?

Bribery is not the act of attempting to find a solution that pleases both ourselves and our child. With this strategy, the "prize" can be offered in advance, and everyone will be happy. Providing a reward in the middle of misbehaving teaches children to misbehave to get a reward from their parents.

Research indicates that rewarding a child for a behavior conveys the message that the action must be undesirable, as it "must be rewarded." (Markham, 2022)

Because rewards are so potent, youngsters focus on the reward rather than the "unpleasant" activity they're engaged in. Unfortunately, in this way, children miss out on the intrinsic joys of participating in the activity.

What's So Bad About Bribing Your Child?

Grit

Helping children build grit is an effective method for motivating youngsters and empowering them to inspire themselves. Grit is resilience or endurance, which goes hand-in-hand with fostering a growth attitude in our children.

Why is resilience crucial in children? The importance of grit in children stems from the fact that gaining determination at a young age will aid their overall performance in life. Children with grit are individuals that consistently engage in a purposeful practice, whether in sports, academics, or other talents. These "resilient" children also recognize that natural aptitude is an illusion and that effort and practice over extended periods enable individuals to acquire the skills and talents they desire. Having grit impacts all aspects of a child's development and will also have a significant impact on their future achievement.

How do we enable children to build grit? The primary and most crucial method we may help youngsters build grit is by praising their effort rather than their talent. If we applaud, for instance, a child's "natural ability" for math, that child will stop trying when they find they are no longer the best at math. This child, who has been recognized for their "natural ability," does not understand the significance of the practice, believing that if they are defeated in natural ability, there is no way to recover. We can avoid this by instead complimenting a child's effort. When we commend a child's action, such as praising a child for studying so diligently for a multiplication test, we convey to this child that their work is acknowledged and making a difference. This praise encourages youngsters to strive harder because they understand that effort, not innate talent, produces skills and abilities.

What Is Grit, Why Kids Need It, and How You Can Foster It

Reward

Additionally, we must make certain that any award given to a child is genuine. What is a genuine incentive? True rewards are those that are tied to a child's effort or performance. For example, a youngster has worked diligently to master the skill of bicycling. Once they have practiced for a few days on their two-wheeled bicycle, the child is eventually able to ride it by themselves. As a result of their hard work, you want to reward them. You've given some thought to getting the kid a new bike or a new gaming system. Which of the following advantages is genuine? It is obvious that the child should be rewarded with a bicycle because they have worked so hard to master this skill. When we give children meaningful rewards, we show them that good conduct has natural consequences.

Citation

Markham, L. (2022, July 1). What’s So Bad About Bribing Your Child? | Psychology Today. Psychology Today; www.psychologytoday.com. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/peaceful-parents-happy-kids/201707/whats-so-bad-about-bribing-your-child

Williams, J. (2015, June 1). What Is Grit, Why Kids Need It, and How You Can Foster It - A Fine Parent. A Fine Parent; afineparent.com. https://afineparent.com/building-character/what-is-grit.html